A Humbling, Second Unmedicated Birth Story: Learning Patience

One would think that going into my third birth experience, I would feel more confident, and in a way, I did. But on the other hand, I remembered what it was like going unmedicated last time and so the rose-colored glasses were off. I really did want another unmedicated birth and my healthiest pregnancy yet. I tried really hard to make that a reality.

The first trimester absolutely wrecked me. I was SO tired, in a way I had not been with my previous pregnancies. The nausea and food aversions were honestly minimal compared to my other big girls, but the exhaustion was truly next level. I slept as much as I could. When my husband came home from work, most days, I would go right to bed at 6pm and sleep til 6am! The second trimester was great, as it usually is. I worked out daily, took good care of myself and felt really good! We attended a birth preparation class that was super valuable, even as a third-time mom. It seemed like almost immediately when I hit 30 weeks pregnant, that my body decided it was too tired. I started to have a ton of hip and pelvic floor pain and took myself to the PT in hopes that I would not be completely miserable the rest of the pregnancy. Dr. O'Brien helped a ton with the pelvic floor pain, but the bigger my belly got, the worse the pressure and pain became. I was ready for this baby to come out! At 35 weeks of pregnancy, we decided to switch hospitals. I was feeling ignored and unsupported where I had previously delivered, so we checked out some options around us and decided to give the OB team at Vernon Health a chance. I was wary since I had only previously birthed with midwives, but the OBs here reassured me. Their goal was to create a birthing center at their hospital that felt supportive and calming. My one hang-up was the lack of water-birth ability. I could not imagine giving birth without the relief of the tub, but with some major mental preparation, I came to have faith that I could do it and we officially transferred care at 36 weeks pregnant. I truly did not think I would be pregnant for much longer!

My sister had her third baby two whole weeks early, and so, in spite of logic, I was thinking this one would come early as well. It was wishful thinking. My due date came and went and I was still heavily pregnant. I could not walk well, because of how bad my pelvic floor hurt from holding up the weight of the baby, so I was praying daily for this baby to come.

On the morning of January 7th, I decided to try inducing myself with a small amount of castor oil. Baby was two days past-due and I used a tiny amount like Dr. Stu and Blyss suggest. It did not make me sick at all, but did start some contractions. I had contractions frequently for hours and they never seemed to become more regular until evening. The contractions did not hurt at all, so I was fearful that they were not doing anything to my cervix. By around 6pm, they were only two minutes apart, so we headed to the hospital to get checked out. When we got checked in and monitored for a bit, I was so disheartened to learn that I was only 2cm dilated. We decided to go labor at home and see if things picked up on their own. This whole pregnancy was teaching me patience, but it really came home this night. My husband and I had talked on the way home and decided I would do another dose of the castor oil the next day to get things moving. Especially during the third trimester, we had been praying for God's Will be done in this birth, and when we got home, tucked into bed, I felt really strongly that taking another dose of the castor oil, while praying for God's Will to be done in this birth was contradictory. So, my husband prayed with me at bedtime, and we resigned to wait for labor to begin on it's own. I went to bed around 9pm. I woke up around 2:30am on January 8th with one really strong contraction. It was not super painful, but it was very strong. I suspected this was real labor, but decided to let him sleep while timing contractions to see if things were progressing. By 4am, I knew this was really labor, and was beginning to have to focus deeply through the contractions even though they were still far apart. I woke up my husband and we started gathering our things to go in! He called my mom, and I had some bloody show, which made me super excited- things were progressing! It was a really icy, warm night, so the drive took about 45 minutes to the hospital. Contractions were not super close together, but were very intense, requiring my focus on my breathing in the truck. I even had started putting my hand on the cold window to help me cope with the contractions, since the cold distracted me and made it much easier to breathe and relax through them. I could absolutely tell that when I was able to relax through them, the contractions were significantly less painful.

We arrived and checked into the hospital. I was relieved to be admitted without an cervical exams required. We did some fetal monitoring upon admission and settled in for the long haul. The contractions stayed pretty far apart, but were building in intensity rather quickly. I could feel the pressure dilating my cervix with each one. My water had not broken, which was a totally different experience than with my previous births and it made the contractions much more manageable. I labored for a while before requesting a cervical check around 5:30am and the OB found me to be about 5cm dilated, fully effaced and baby was really low. Contractions were getting closer together and more intense. I labored on the birth ball almost exclusively, since swaying my hips on it helped me to keep my pelvic floor relaxed. The heating pad on my front belly helped a lot too. When I started wanting counter pressure, I asked to be checked again. It was around 7am and I was 7cm dilated. I think that check, spurred my body faster, because the very next contraction was super painful. I had back labor with my previous births, and so the pain in the lower front of my uterus was new to me and it surprised me with how intense it was.

With all my pelvic floor issues in this pregnancy, I had a little bit of a bladder issue and I could feel each contraction putting pressure on my bladder which was a super uncomfortable feeling. My husband was super helpful with counter pressure, using essential oils, reminding me to keep my mouth open and make low sounds; all of which he learned in that birth class we took. Finally, I was struggling to cope and decided to get into the tub.

There is a reason it's called the midwive's epidural! The water helped me to relax so much through the contractions. I could feel the pressure directly on my bladder and needed to pee, but could not relax enough to do it! I labored in the tub for a while, but then wanted to get out, it was so hot in the water. I suspect the motion of shifting my hips climbing out of the tub was what moved baby enough to allow me to pee finally and then contractions were back to back. I begged for the epidural at this point! Usually when I start begging for the epidural is when baby is imminent. The nurses got the nitrous oxide gas ready for me to try once I was out of the tub. I moved back to the birth ball and as soon as I sat down, my body started pushing on it's own! I had to get off the birth ball because of the intense pressure in my bottom. The gas was helpful in that it forced me to breathe deeply and slowly, but it did not really take the pain away, so I didn't use it for more than a few contractions. I climbed up onto the hospital bed and had the nurses elevate the back so I could be in a squatted position. Pushing was happening involuntarily and I heard the nurses calling for the OB. She scrubbed in and came to the bedside and patiently waited for the baby.

Pushing was such a relief. The hot, intense pain in the lower front of my uterus had stopped and contractions were productive now. After learning about something called "open glottis pushing" at the birth class we attended, it was super helpful to be able to use that skill when pushing this time. It allowed me to stretch slowly and have her come out slowly to lessen odds of tearing. My water had not broken yet, so it was a ton of pressure, but was still easier than the contractions during transition. Sometime during pushing, my water broke with a huge gush. A few short pushes later, she was born! My husband was able to step back and catch our baby with the OBs supervision and that was so cool! They passed her between my legs so I could see her and the first thing I said was "That's a huge baby!" My last baby was only 6lbs and some ounces, so this baby looked and felt way bigger! At 8 and a half pounds, she had my previous baby beat handily and it was significantly more effort trying to push her out.

looking at the new baby

I laid back and the team put baby B on my chest. She was so calm and barely cried. We allowed her to do the breast crawl on her own for about thirty minutes and then I got impatient and helped her to latch. After her cord turned white, we cut it and moved her over with my husband to do some skin-to-skin while I pushed out the placenta. I lost a decent amount of blood over the approximately thirty minute wait to deliver the placenta, so I decided to have some IV pitocin to help slow the bleeding. The staff at the hospital were all so caring and wonderful. After they checked her APGARs, they left. We had a four hour long "golden hour" and called the nurses in when we were ready for them to do her newborn checks. Overall, it was a wonderful experience from start to finish there. The staff was so clearly well trained in natural births; they read and were on board with my birth plan and we felt so supported the whole time we were there. It was such a lovely and peaceful way to welcome our third little girl. The theme of this pregnancy was patience, and I am learning to slow down and savor these days with a newborn. I said in that hospital bed that I'd get an epidural next time but, I 100% would do it unmedicated again. It was such an empowering experience and honestly my recovery has been so much easier with this baby. She's such a deliciously chubby baby and is so very calm. The calm is such a nice reprieve from the colicky babies I've had before.

All in all, I can summarize this birth by saying how thankful I am for it to go so smoothly, thankful for my husband’s support and thankful for our birth team at the hospital. They made all the difference.

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